As kids, one of the scariest moments in our lives is when our parents look at our school grades. The fright and jittery feeling it gives.

Just a few days ago I felt the same fright and jittery feeling.
This time not because my parents were looking at my grades.

I am an adult now you know?
But I realized a few days ago that, it wasn't only our parents that could create that feeling.

It was recreated when I went for this job interview, I've been studying to get this job for months.

I was asked questions, which I answered to the best of my ability.
I gave my best smile and composure the whole session.

They politely told me to wait outside while they decided, I was the last person that was interviewed.
And they were going to decide immediately, instead of the habitual
"You will receive a call if we decide to employ you".

So, we were waiting.
And as we all know, waiting is never an easy task.
I had all different thoughts running through my mind as I saw four other people who were there waiting for a reply.

My confidence suddenly started dropping as time went by, I started comparing myself to the others.
Various thoughts of "what ifs" ran through my mind.

About an hour later we were called in all together.
As they were evaluating us one after the other, my anxiousness increased and I felt that jittery feeling again.

For the first time, as an adult, I felt jittery and afraid of what I would hear.
Then I couldn't help thinking back to that time with my parents.

"Ah, so it still feels the same even as an adult? "
I asked myself, even though I knew the answer to it..
Just one crucial approval could make me get the job and disapproval can also bring it all to naught.

Will I be validated or will it all be for naught?
© Keenah