I am not okay,
It is hard to say that,
But you don't know,
Because you somehow can say it.
I can't,
I can't because I feel,
I know,
That everybody is looking at me,
For guidance,
For comfort,
For a smile,
For help with their emotions,
How funny is that,
How ironic is it,
That people look at me for help with their emotions,
When I can't even handle my own,
I try to explain,
But they all think I am joking,
So we laugh,
And hears the sadness in my laughs or words,
I smile so they don't say I am faking it,
Because I am afraid that they will say I am lying if I try to tell the truth,
How hard is it to say I'm not okay though,
I do know because every time I try I end up saying,
I am okay.
© The Scarlett poet