Trust I wonder what it is
How does it comes so easily
To many, to others
How does it happen
To let someone into your life
To share the innermost desires,
Secrets, wants, experiences
To talk, to let it all out
Believe me...
I really want to know
How do I believe, It's okay to let go
I try hard, I really do
But I can't,
May be I don't know how to
As I have never done this before
Bottled up, everything kept inside me
Carefully sealed and locked
May be no one ever asked earlier
May be no one wanted to know
So it became a trait, it became me
When, I can't remember
Few who asked later
Did they really wanted to know
Where they really interested in me
Whole of me
And then will they be with me
Just like that, not for a reason
Any reason
I don't remember last when I cried
Infront of someone
Yes I have made my walls around me strong
Strong enough not to let anyone in
To be dependent on someone emotionally
And then it ending,
Shatters me
I can't let that happen
So I push people away
I have learned to be alone
It's not easy,
Knowing that there is no one around
Sometimes when you just want someone
To talk to, to just hold you
to give a warm hug and say
It's okay, I am there
No matter what
No questions asked
No explanation required
Just like that
For me
Not for my body,
Even not for my emotions
But just because the person wants to be there
I know it's a fantasy, an unrealistic dream
Never to be fulfilled
I am sorry
I can't let you in

© agypsysoul

#thoughtsofagypsysoul #kuchkahikuchankahi #trust #trustissues #trusting