I look around as the sky comes pouring down.
Everyone is scattering out of the rain, breaking the crowd,
But I just stand there, looking around in circles,
And the sky above me is crying as it charcoals.

Everything feels so cold and numb.
As more tears slip down my cheek, I feel more dumb.
I am completely surrounded by so many,
Yet I feel so unconditionally lonely.

Am I supposed to feel so empty and dead inside?
Am I supposed to go out of my mind?
Am I supposed to cry it all out and scream?
Am I supposed to feel alive or dead or somewhere in between?

Everything hurts and I need something to numb the pain.
I don't want to stay here, but I can't move out of the rain.
Not until I see you running up to me like the first time.
This is how we met, right? But you're no longer mine.

I can feel all the anxiety building up again.
All this loneliness is causing more and more pain.
The aching in my heart won't go away.
And I can't breathe anymore. I just feel like mushed clay.

Everything around me feels like a blur.
But I can also see everything so clear.
I have no one left that I can turn to anymore.
And I guess I want to know. Can I show up at your door?

#Loneliness
© MvanZyl