Hey, how ya doing?
it's me, myself
just wondering what you are up to.
--silence--
oh yeah I forgot, my friends ,I have none
nowhere to go.
nothing to do.
I am all alone in this world living with no life.
it gets so cold being alone all the time.
it feels almost like back when I was married and had a wife.
empty.
I'm getting so numb.
I can't win at anything,
and I'm really staring to feel dumb.
for all the times that I thought I had joy.
It was fake!
no joy, because then there'd be happiness and being happy is just a twisted fucking ploy.
a plot.
a twist in my story I call my own.
friendships lost, anger built with rage behind a fake smile.
nothing but empty sadness I express and always shown.
there is no hope, although I believe in God.
I pray for the things I know I want and need but none of them are heard,
so alone I walk on many streets, looking blank and feeling odd.
when are my dreams ever going to come true?
why can't I ever seem to be happy?
I have no fucking clue!
I'm tired
I'm angry
sad
alone and scared.
killing myself with me is a constant struggle,
but unfortunately I'm always spared.
sick and twisted I fucking hate myself , I'm dead.
just for once I want more than this in reality and not just in my head.