It was that night I took myself out,
To drown out the noise coming from within.
To bury these dreams that never came out,
Quite deeply, they laid, under thin skin.

Between two worlds, we have our being,
Between the two, seen and unseen.
Between two worlds, it took all to persist.
Between the two, I couldn't be.

It was darker in a way I never understood before -
The way my inner world implored.
Too quiet to be heard by any human ear -
Too loud, though, inside.
It came out in tears.

I don't want to be empty,
And never feel pity.
This in not what I intended,
On the outskirts of this city.

This blackhole of a thing,
This void, it swallows plenty.
For every feeling left to burn,
In the bottom of my belly.

Every prayer never prayed,
For a better way to stop it.
Answers I could've gotten -
Behind the door I never knocked on.

For so long I hardly knew who I was.
I engaged in others, but I was no one.
Invested in lives that never knew I existed.
Thank you, to the few.
About five or six of them.

Thoughts that troubled me no longer bothered me.
I wasn't burying dreams -
I was burying reality.
I wasn't scared, more so serene.
To be honest, relieved,
That I could decide to get up and leave.

Sadly enough, those thoughts gave me peace.
As I looked in the mirror and wished my reflection would cease.
Sometimes I'd never look back at all.
Afraid my day may be ruined if I seen me off guard.

Somewhere out there, another can hear it.
Someone, your father, your brother, maybe.
Silently burns on the outskirts of reality.
Hears the tears of another, and that man is me.

Down many streets I've walked, weak.
Hiding in plain sight what I cannot speak.
Crying for what came to me through my father,
Granted a shattered past of his father's.

The perpetual pendulum swings,
And transfers the muttering energies.
The songs of sons suffered in silence.
Lives stolen, and nobody sees.

MateoY _