I have become everything I swore I would not become.
I have become selfish, greedy, self-centered and self-righteous.
I have become that which I now despise.
How, how did this happen?
When did this happen and why?
When I look into the mirror, I see the old me looking back.
I feel like I have lost touch with who I have become.
The evil thoughts that plague me day and night and the ugliness behind it all.
Have I risen to the top just to drown in it once again?
I tell myself that I can overcome,
I tell myself to fight, fight, fight!
That this war has yet to be won.
My solution lies in front of me.
Why can't I pick up the key that will and can set me free?
I see myself locked in a cage fighting for my freedom.
I am fighting against a resistance and this resistance just so happens to be me.
This is a war I can not win on my own so I fall to my knees and pray save me Father, save me from the evil that destroys my everyday.

© Carpe Diem 22021